殷勤sjk

, “My Name Is Alana” – a new beginning, and the beginning of her life as an author. She had just left her house that morning for her first writing session at the local coffee shop to write a story. Her best friend in high school, Alana was excited about what she planned to do that day, but also very nervous because of how it would affect their friendship. The only reason she had invited him along with her today was to make sure he didn't leave her alone, or worse, find someone else who needed a friend more. That was all she could ask from anyone.

“You're going on this date with that girl again, right?” A voice called out from behind her. Alana turned around to look at her boyfriend in the passenger seat of his car, smiling sheepishly. He had seen her go up to the counter earlier when they were waiting to order coffee and pastries. When he noticed her leave with another guy, he decided to come and check on her. His girlfriend was his other half and he wanted to support her. After being a couple for a few months already and knowing each other pretty well, he knew that Alana was very hard working and had a lot on her mind that week. The thought made him happy that he could be there to help out and take care of her whenever she needed it. But he still felt like he should've been able to do something to make things easier for her. He had tried talking to her about it once, but all he could get from her was a smile and that everything was okay. So he figured now wasn't the time to push it. Instead, he just hoped that she would let him know if he could help somehow. “What are you doing now? I can drop you off at the library later so you can write some ideas if you want.” He asked as he put on his blinker. They were headed to the nearest public library for her first reading session. “That'd mean I wouldn't have to pick you up later and drive you home too...” Alana blushed, feeling guilty that he spent more time with her than he had before because of work. She hated seeing him so stressed out during the days that he couldn't even come over to watch TV with her and talk with her. Sometimes he would even forget to eat dinner. It broke her heart every time he looked upset, because he was always so proud. If anything was happening that was stressing him out, she just wanted to do everything she could to help him calm down and make it better. And since she hadn't worked yet, she had no one else she could turn to. That was why she invited him along with her today. “Actually, um…” Alana paused, trying to think of what she was going to say next and not wanting him to feel disappointed or guilty for not spending enough time with her. ‘How much longer am I supposed to lie to him?'

“Yeah, babe?” The man in question stopped driving when he saw that Alana's hands were fidgeting nervously on her lap. “Is something wrong? Is it your professor?” He tried to comfort her by putting an arm over the steering wheel. “I'm sure he'll understand if you told him that you can't finish the assignment because you got too distracted by the new guy and forgot about the project.” Alana sighed and shook her head before continuing speaking. She was glad that he tried to comfort her, but she still knew he didn't understand, nor did he really want to. He had no idea how much of an impact her words had made on her professor’s opinion of him. She knew her professor cared for her well being and he would never force her to write something she wasn't comfortable with, but Alana also understood that the old man liked giving credit where it is due. As long as she could meet his standards, then she was fine. She couldn’t afford to be ungrateful though, so she continued with telling him what was wrong. “It's not a professor though... it's a new guy I met yesterday.” Alana said, glancing away from him and playing with her fingers instead of looking into his eyes like usual when she spoke. It was difficult to explain that he had affected her way more deeply than most people. She knew her professor cared for her well being, but she also felt that he needed to respect other human beings’ boundaries. If he insisted on treating her the way she was treated by most of her colleagues in the university, then he might lose his position. The pressure of working under such high expectations for so many years must have gotten to him sometimes. She was willing to give up any opportunity to live without any restrictions, because the freedom gave her a lot of inspiration. Being surrounded by books, and having a goal in mind, was the only thing that kept her sane and motivated. But at least her professor had respect for people's needs and opinions and was kind enough to show her compassion when she needed it. “I don't know how much more I can go to school like this, Ryan,” she finally confessed. “The last thing I want to do is disappoint my professors and classmates and disappoint myself. This is all too complicated. I just wish I was better at expressing myself and understanding emotions. You know how hard it is to find something I can express myself in that's even close to being good enough!” She sighed again and crossed her arms over her chest. Ryan looked at his girlfriend sadly before nodding in agreement. They both knew that Alana had a lot to deal with after leaving college and taking on this job to help support herself. They both understood what it was like to be unable to do anything in your free time and being constantly pushed to work harder and faster when you weren't ready. But the problem was that Alana was getting too far ahead of herself in these efforts. They still had no idea how the deadline would be, and they had plenty of time to prepare. Still, he knew that she was working herself too hard. Maybe if they didn’t work so much, she’d feel less pressured, he thought to himself. However, he knew that she was afraid, and that was why he wanted to help her out. He was worried that she would get overwhelmed and fail the whole project, and that she would blame herself afterwards. It was hard to see her like that, he thought. “We'll be fine, babe. We'll figure something out.” Alana nodded gratefully, grateful that she had a boyfriend like him and he always stuck up for her when she was being unreasonable. He was the person who supported her most when she was struggling with anxiety attacks, depression, anger issues, or any other issues that came up during her studies. She was lucky to have him for a boyfriend. He made her laugh and reminded her that it was normal to get nervous, but she didn’t have to act like an idiot about it either. He would always be there for her no matter what. With his encouragement, her confidence rose up a little bit more and she took another sip of her hot chocolate before speaking again. “Speaking of studying… I actually need your help with this.” She reached for his backpack sitting in the front seat and pulled out a stack of papers that were almost completely filled by now. “I don't

know how much more I can go to school like this, Ryan,” she finally confessed. “The last thing I want to do is disappoint my professors and classmates and disappoint myself. This is all too complicated. I just wish I was better at expressing myself and understanding emotions. You know how hard it is to find something I can express myself in that's even close to being good enough!” She sighed again and crossed her arms over her chest. Ryan looked at his girlfriend sadly before nodding in agreement. They both knew that Alana had a lot to deal with after leaving college and taking on this job to help support herself. They both understood what it was like to be unable to do anything in your free time and being constantly pushed to work harder and faster when you weren't ready. But the problem was that Alana was getting too far ahead of herself in these efforts. They still had no idea how the deadline would be, and they had plenty of time to prepare. Still, he knew that she was working herself too hard. Maybe if they didn’t work so much, she’d feel less pressured, he thought to himself. However, he knew that she was afraid, and that was why he wanted to help her out. He was worried that she would get overwhelmed and fail the whole project, and that she would blame herself afterwards. It was hard to see her like that, he thought. “We'll be fine, babe. We'll figure something out.” Alana nodded gratefully, grateful that she had a boyfriend like him and he always stuck up for her when she was being unreasonable. He was the person who supported her most when she was struggling with anxiety attacks, depression, anger issues, or any other issues that came up during her studies. She was lucky to have him for a boyfriend. He made her laugh and reminded her that it was normal to get nervous, but she didn’t have to act like an idiot about it either. He would always be there for her no matter what. With his encouragement, her confidence rose up a little bit more and she took another sip of her hot chocolate before speaking again. “Speaking of studying… I actually need your help with this.” She reached for his backpack sitting in the front seat and pulled out a stack of papers that were almost completely filled by now. “I don't understand it at all. I know I studied for that exam this morning but all I seem to remember is a bunch of numbers and formulas, not the actual lesson or what we learned today. I think you can teach me how to fix it and hopefully finish up this class so I can focus on what's important to me.” Alana handed the papers to him and he nodded in response while staring at them in confusion. He didn't really understand all that jargon she used either, but he knew her well enough to know that she wanted him to read through everything with her, just in case there was something missing in her notes. They both had a lot of faith in their professors to know what they were learning, but the fact remained that they probably didn't know everything. He knew that it would take him a while before he was fluent in any of those subjects, but he could try to learn fast enough for Alana's sake. “Do you need me to read through it to help you with what you didn't understand?” He asked, knowing that it would take her even longer to memorize everything. She seemed relieved by his offer since she knew that the longer she left it until finishing her assignments, the less likely it was that she would pass the test anyway. “If you don’t mind, you can take it slow, but I will probably need some extra help, especially since the subject is advanced.” Alana explained. She knew that Ryan wasn’t the best student in his classes since he tended to keep forgetting to pay attention, but he was one of those people who was hardworking in everything he did and was eager to impress her, no matter how much he struggled with something else. He smiled at her before grabbing a pen from his pocket and taking out his notebook from underneath the driver’s seat.

Chapter 2

It was already dark outside, but Alana didn'T want to return to the dorms because the only place that she wanted to be right now was beside her boyfriend, sleeping soundly on her sofa. He'd fallen asleep around half past midnight, after spending so long listening to her talk about how stressful she felt. He knew that she was scared of failing the exam she was about to take, but that was why she was here, studying at his house instead of her own. She loved studying alongside him, but he didn't have a clue what to expect from her, so she wanted to spend the night at his place since she was already there and they could spend some quality time together, which she needed to relax after her exam. Besides, Alana loved spending time with Ryan whenever she could, so the reason for her decision was very logical, even though it made Ryan a little angry since he had been planning a romantic evening for her tonight, but she wouldn't listen to him. They could always reschedule their plans, he thought reluctantly as he put the empty paper cup back in the cup holder and turned off the car light. Alana shifted in her seat slightly so she was facing him. He stared at her for a moment, thinking about how lucky he was to have her in his life, before reaching his hand across the gear shift and intertwining his fingers with hers. “You're right. I love you, Alana.” Alana giggled happily, resting her head against his shoulder gently with her free hand wrapped around his leg.

“I love you too,” She whispered softly, closing her eyes slowly as she leaned her head back. Ryan kissed the side of her face affectionately. Alana smiled happily, leaning back against his shoulder with a satisfied sigh. After a few minutes, her breathing slowed down, meaning that she was starting to fall asleep. Ryan smiled lovingly at her before turning the engine back on and backing out of the driveway.